If you’ve ever canceled plans with me, thank you. You are my favorite kind of person. There is almost nothing I schedule in the world that I wouldn’t be happier if it were canceled. The farther away it is, the more I want it to get canceled. If any type of traffic could be involved, please, please cancel.
I’ve canceled plans outside the place where the plans were supposed to take place. I do let people know, but it’s much harder now that my kids are adults because I used to always use them as an excuse to cancel anything and everything in my life. Maybe I should have had a third kid along the way just to get the built-in cancellation toddler.
There is nothing quite like dreading something and then having it canceled. It’s like sitting on the couch with a giant bowl of perfectly-popped popcorn and a sweet tea, about to watch a trashy rom-com. Pajamas on. Snacks measured. Netflix, let’s go.
I was a terrible Internet dater because I would routinely cancel everything that was a first. If a woman wanted to have a phone call or Zoom before meeting, I would set it and then cancel 99.863% of the time and delete them. I would estimate my first meeting cancellation rate at 53.4%. I am not a ghoster, though; I am a liar (only in the form of cancellations).
Sometimes I cancel things that I set up for a specific reason and planned to do myself. It just gets close to the time to execute, and I would rather not. These are the best cancellations because I don’t have to let anyone know of my impending hibernation.
Whoever came up with the phrase “Plans were meant to be broken” is my kind of person. And it runs counter to my personality because I am always early. But I can only be early for something I didn’t cancel.
© Jonathan Greene, November 11, 2026
