I wouldn’t necessarily call getting your statin upped from 10 to 20 mg a heart problem, but it’s something. This happened the same morning I had my first spoonful of sea moss. I’ve never had heart problems, but I also don’t want to become someone who does. I need to amp up my exercise routine and stop being a wussy about working out hard because I am old. I can’t fix my cardiac calcium score, but I can keep adding layers of positive potpourri on top.
This may not be my only heart problem. My other heart problem is love. I am not that into it, and especially not into trying to find it. I’ve not dated more than a trickle in at least four years and don’t find myself worrying about it being a problem. I’m fine with it, but maybe that’s the heart ailment. Maybe my cardiac calcium score has hardened a different part of my heart.
I used to play every sport. I was an athlete. I used to work out like a cyborg. Now, getting 10,000 steps in a day is my achievement. I don’t like to push myself. Sometimes, if I just shoot around at the nearby park, I can't catch my breath as easily. I can never decide if I have a bad heart or if I am just lazy and out of shape. My dad bod light says the latter.
It’s not that I don’t see attractive women out in the world. I am not oblivious to that, but my first thought is usually, “That seems like a lot of work.” Someone, somewhere, is posting this in a Reddit forum called r/undateable. And I am even okay with that because it’s mostly true. I am not scared of love; I just have other things I would rather be doing.
It’s hard to talk to your heart doctor about the extra twenty pounds you are carrying around since last year because you know he has heard every bullshit excuse in the book. So, I just tell him the truth. I have a home gym with a Peloton, and I don’t use either enough. I prioritize other things, but I do take my medication and eat well. I just don’t want to swing a kettlebell between my legs.
It’s hard to talk to your friends about dating when they say things like, “You are going to waste being single.” I think the waste might be me taking up someone else’s time in this heartspace. I’m not dead to love. When I see a couple in public being nice to each other, I think that it’s nice. When I see another couple in public arguing, I think it’s nice that it’s not me.
© Jonathan Greene, November 5, 2026
